Why should I spare your feelings when you've clearly never spared mine?
I can't get over my bitterness.
I can't get over how you broke my heart.
I can't get over how you never thought you were wrong, despite the apologies.
I can't get over how stupid I was.

So in a split second. Without realizing it.
I was slowly hardened.
In a game; one sentence hardens the character.
You don't have to mean it. Just click.
And they're hardened.

It's like that in life, too. You don't have to mean what you do.
But the effects last a long time.
It's no longer pretty poetry, filled with sentimental feelings that's written.
It's angry and sad.
And sometimes I wish it weren't so brutally honest.
Even though the one person who wanted the truth was me.

Sometimes, I wonder:
Had I not known... would it still have hurt so much?
But I knew. From the very beginning. I warned myself. I told them.
And all trust was thrown into oblivion.
Because it obviously didn't mean enough.

I loved you.
And it was thrown into my face.
I can't say I'll never again. Because I don't want that. And I deserve better.
I'm not going to give up my life because I was foolish and trusted people I knew were weak.
Trusted people whom were already hurting me even as I told them. Before and after.

It hurt me, when I found out my friends liked you better.
That you crossed the line.
That you did everything you said you wouldn't.

But I can't forgive you.
I wish I could.
But nothing is ever going to be the same.
Because I'm not sure if I love you enough to even act like I do.